Dog Jokes

spottydog

here's one I found earlier....

The Top 20 Reasons Why Dogs Don't Use Computers

-- Source: David Letterman Show

20. Can't stick their heads out of Windows XP.
19. Fetch command not available on all platforms.
18. Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
17. Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.
16. Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."
15. Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.
14. Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.
13. Keep bruising noses trying to catch that JPEG Frisbee.
12. Not at all fooled by Dogmore Screen Saver.
11. Still trying to come up with an "emoticon" that signifies tail-wagging.
10. Oh, but they WILL... with the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb.
9. Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
8. 'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...
7. Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.
6. SmellU-SmellMe still in beta test.
5. SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question!
4. Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to maneuver.
3. Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg.
2. Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.

And the Number 1 Reason Dogs Don't Use Computers...
1. TrO{gO HyAqR4tDc TgrOo TgYPmE WeIjTyH P;AzWqS,.

Spottydog
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Pretty Polly Pavey of Polidot - 06/08/1996 - 13/07/2006 - Dalspa Liquid Gold for Polidot 20/10/1999 - 08/05/2007 - Polly and Polo together again

jake

Beware of the Dog
Upon entering a small country store, a stranger noticed a sign saying DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside a harmless old hound dog was asleep on the floor besides the cash register.
He asked the store manager, "Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?"
"Yep, that's him," he replied.
The amused stranger inquired, "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?"
The owner responded, "Because, before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."

westkit

Thanks Spottydog for the info. Make me funny

Haustiere Lovers Portal

oracle

love the jokes keep them coming Very Happy